Someone is Always Doing Worse

I’m probably one of the most laid back first time moms. Especially in this millennial, organic, non-dairy, peanut-allergy ridden world. My approach to parenting is that somebody is always doing a worse job than I am. That sounds like a free-range parenting disaster, but don’t worry I’m not headed down that road. In fact I’m a hands-on discipline approving mom, but I’m also not willing to live in a world where I’m never good enough.

Don’t get me wrong I’ve spent many nights googling all the side effects of the many mistakes I’ve made as a parent. In fact, I’ve googled so many things I could probably write a book. Yesterday’s search was “What to do if your baby eats a leaf.” Someone actually posted that their kid ate a dead bug, so my mission statement stands true… someone’s always doing worse.

First time moms often fall trap to the heart wrenching reality that how they parent this little being will ultimately have life-changing effects, and while that’s true I want those effects to include things like perseverance, resilience, and a strong immunity to air.

Millennials often hear the phrase “we turned out fine” in response to a variety of new-age approaches to parenting. Three generations ago women were smoking and drinking while pregnant, and while we’ve learned the lasting effects of those choices, we’ve also started to see the repercussions of extreme sanitation and sheltering. A few decades worth of helicopter parenting has resulted in rising flu deaths and a generation of kids who need their mom to attend their first job interview.

Meanwhile my kid is getting battle wounds in the church nursery, gnawing on Dad’s textbooks, and occasionally crying it out during nap time. I don’t say all of this just to prescribe my approach. I say it to remind other moms that there’s always someone doing worse than you, and maybe that person is me, but as long as our kids are sheltered, clothed (most of the time), and loved that’s all that really matters.